Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Damn You Santa for not eating the cookies I left for you!

12/27/2011:  3:21pm:  Well today marks day 50 of fat camp(Aultman Weight Loss New Outlook Program) and I can honestly say that I've made it through almost all of them completely unscathed.

I say almost because on Day 48 (Christmas Day), I finally broke.  Before I tell you what I did and to what extent let me preface the story by saying A. I've never been more disappointed in myself, and B. I did not jump off of the cliff, but rather walked slightly off of the beat and path I had been on so vigorously to that point.

So in case you are keeping score somewhere in cyberspace, Grandma's one of a kind, once a year prepared, Homemade Xmas Cookies - 1, Rob - 0!  I am not perfect and if you've ever read this blog previously you know I don't claim to be, but I did fail in this particular case.  Allow me to explain:  The whole day had gone well, and week for that matter, but for some reason when I walked into my Grandma's house and saw those incredibly stocked trays full of the holiday cheer that I have both revered and currently fear, I simply without warning or prior thought to the action I was taking, folded like a cheap card table.  I sampled about a half dozen or so, walked away and never looked at them again.  But that is really where the story begins.

It was the moments after the reflex reaction and the hour or two that followed that led me to this "not such a revelation moment."  It wasn't so much that I tried them, or even the number that I consumed in that those two factors are not enough in themselves to derail my overall progress and effort.  After all I am in week 3 of consistent workouts, which is enabling to burn more and increase energy levels and better my overall health.  BUT, it was the quick realization that I was not even hungry and in looking back I'm not even sure I wanted them.  I truly believe 2 factors led to the unconscious act that has me owning up to all in this post.  1- I knew given my holiday travel schedule, and the times the clinic was open to check in for weigh in and consultation did not synch, so I would not be able to weigh in until Tuesday January 3rd, on day 57.  Accountability to both the wonderful folks at fat camp (Aultman Weight Loss Center) who have instilled in us the tools necessary to be successful, and those reading this blog for some form of inspiration or relative understanding of the struggle it is to truly change a lifestyle.  I believe the lack of accountability outside of myself, where ultimately it needs to be for complete success, let me drop my guard just long enough to relive the past.  And 2 - a simple habit or pattern of behavior that has been active for so many years. My grandma's house is truly a sanctuary for food lovers and a celebration of it since I was little.  I think when I saw them in the very same spot, displayed in the very same way they have been for the entirety of my life and many decades before me, I reacted as opposed to remembering the ultimate goal and reason for this journey which is health and happiness.  Part of that end game involves the weight loss.  That means until I have completely mastered the tools and behaviors involved with and being instilled as part of my Aultman New Outlook program, I need to make a conscious effort to only make conscious decisions.

Having gone through that very experience, I am more committed than ever as I realize now that I am not bullet proof or immune to tripping along the path.  I'm humbled like a contestant in "The Biggest Loser" that walks out of the vault in the cupcake challenge with icing on fingers and face.  BUT I DO NOW understand how truly monumental of an undertaking to change habits and lifestyle this really is.  AND I'm no longer taking for granted the weight I have lost with the brutal realization that until I am able to make good decisions every day, and fully embrace moderation, the progress is a very fragile victory unless I stay the course all of the time, and not just when someone's looking.

Good , no GREAT lesson for me to have learned, even the several layers of concrete located directly north of my neck helped me learn it the hard way!  Stay tuned, this continues to be an interesting ride.

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

The Gift that Keeps on Giving (S*#@ It Virginia)

12/21/2011  7:55a.m.:  First off I apologize for not blogging about fat camp (Aultman Weight Loss "New Outlook" Program) and my weigh in after the debacle that was my business trip to Virginia.  So allow me the update, and we will continue from there.  Even though the "Southern Hospitality" had me feeling like I gained due to my body experiencing a sluggish, heavy, weak phase due to the fact not a restaurant in the Roanoke/Salem area apparently can't cook anything not drudged in fat, oil, sodium, or batter - I managed to lose 2.6 pounds!!  My total weight loss stands at 29.4 in 42 days bringing my from a starting weight at 275.0 (and the pics to prove it are up under the people tab along with this blog at www.CantonMarathon.com) to 245.6!  While I was just under the 30 pound mark, I consider a major success considering the unfortunate circumstances I found myself in.

I think the greatest gift I've been given this holiday season is the gaining of the ability to do my best to control what I am putting in my body to minimize the damage when I am faced with adapting to environments that don't by their nature help me to create positive results.  Even though every thought in my head was screaming "screw it if I'm going to be gaining have a burger or piece of cake," I found myself resisting that urge knowing full well the way I put on weight, it is always best to choose discretion as the better part of valor.  Trust me when I tell you the cravings have not subsided, as a matter of fact, they seem to have increased with the abundant presence (no not presents) of the holiday cheer in the form of egg nogg, cookies, starches, chocolate, and of course, celebratory libations I love ( I mean c'mon - we have Yuengling in Ohio now!).  But I think the biggest difference now that I can look in the mirror and see the difference is that even though the cravings are a constant, I am able to resist if only because I don't want to have to take a step back before taking a couple more forward.

So with roughly about 11 days left in the holiday season before most people take to the New Year's resolutions to do what I have been for the past 42 days in an unbelievable baptism by fire of sorts I think it's worth it to continue to resist.  After all 3 months from tomorrow we leave for our honeymoon, and I fully intend and insist on looking far better in those pics than i did in the engagement, wedding, and before pics displayed currently!  I don't want to be laying around the pool at the resort and having other patrons wonder why the hotel staff would keep a species belonging an hour away in the gulf perched in such a small tank for aesthetic purposes!  In other words, I won't be a beached whale on what is supposed to be the most romantic trip one takes at this stage of life.  My wife already looks great and continues to push to improve.  I think I owe her at very least the same effort!

Happy Holidays everybody!  Please have a cookie, some egg nogg,and a beer for me.  I will live vicariously through you folks at the moment!

I will keep posting my trials and tribulations as the next 11 days unfold so stay tuned I'm liable to do something dumb enough worth mentioning.    ;-)

Ps- Thanks Aultman Weight Loss staff, dieticians, and Doctors for teaching me that self control has its own rewards!  It's something that has taken me just over 34 years to learn (Don't judge me - I'm pacing myself!  LOL)

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Fear and Loathing in Virginia

12/16/2011; 9:25a.m.: Well I'm trying to do my best and stay with the fat camp program while in the "Big VA" on business, but I have to say it is fairly difficult considering I am not able to measure anything as I have been fanatical about throughout the process. Also I am not sure where the monacre of "southern hospitality" originated, but I'm fairly certain it WAS NOT in Virginia! Allow me a couple of observations in an otherwise fairly short post.

1. We entered a restaurant which will remain nameless against every natural instinct I have in my being from doing so. I ordered the Key West plate which consists of grilled chicken and shrimp (all protein), sweet baby carrots, green beans, coleslaw and a house salad with fat free ranch. Seemingly healthy at face value, but I made the apparent error in asking for the beans and carrots to be prepared in only hot water and boiled or baked in the same. Response from a clearly unimpressed server " Ummm.... we don't allow special orders because we want you to experience it in all it's splendor.". Me back to a 20 year old with control issues, " That makes total sense but unfortunately I'm on a specific diet plan that has fairly strict protocol." Mr Smarty Pants' response, "Sorry, those are the rules". As I had to remind myself not to stand up and strangle the poindexter like Napoleon standing in front of me I made the best of it and continued the strategy of eating vegetables first and saving the protein for last which brings me to observation number two.

2. Grilled doesn't always fully describe the preparation of the dish. It should have said soaked in thick mixture of dressings for at least a month and still oozing with the extras when served. Ugh!!!!! Now my healthy choices have taken a turn for Southern Fried and High Cholesterol Junction with my server campaigning to be Mayor of the not so hospitable town!

I eat and move on about the day knowing I got a 60 minute cardio workout in and had been walking and moving around all day, and at some point I have to do the best I can with the hand I've been dealt.

So I am continuing the strategy of having a shake immediately following my workout and plan to eat my meal in the middle of the afternoon and shake to finish off the evening so if nothing else, giving the majority of the day to burn the southern hospitality (note dripping sarcasm here), and kill myself in the fitness center each morning. Now I realize working out extra long and intense does not guarantee in any way more of a burn but at least I'll be tired enough not to think too terribly much about why people in the north clearly have better visions of what service and hospitality really mean. So as I sign off for the moment in Roanoke, as I'm sure more "fun" stories will follow, I say "Miss you and see you soon O-H-I-O," where the true meaning of hospitality and holiday spirit exists

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

When Full is Fun

12/13/2011 8:20p: So I went to fat camp last night admittedly hoping for better than the 1.2 I mustered last week! Happily I am able to report I have lost 4.4 pounds this week bringing me to 248.2 for a total loss of 26.8 pounds in 35 days!

Needless to say I am thrilled with where I am at but feel I need to convey a "not such a revelation" moment that has me really happy with my approach to food and eating in general to this point. I am realizing my approach to eating my portioned food has changed to a strategic approach that A. Has me feeling "full" more quickly and B. feeling accomplished with what I am not putting in my body. I attempt to eat my fruit, starch, and fat allotments earlier in the day so it's has more time to process and burn properly. With my water intake increasing to nearly an average of 100 ounces a day my kidneys are able to flush properly and I am not as hungry. More yet I am noticing because of my love for meat and protein that I am saving my chicken, pork, ground turkey, or even steak portion for after I eat my vegetables serving for the day. So only after filling up on salad, grilled or steamed veggies and some water to wash them down do I start to eat the entree. Most impressive to me is I very often am full before finishing my entree which is fine because I have two shakes per day with 26 grams of protein in each and typically 4 teaspoons of peanut butter for my fat intake that also is rich with protein. I'm actually beginning to see a change in lifestyle that the folks at fat camp (Aultman Weight Loss Center) have been preparing me for. Wow, real progress with sustainable practices for the future, this crap might actually work! ;-). Please note the abundance of sarcasm here from the last comment. It is me who is only now realizing that these good folks have been giving me the tools, resources, and best practices to be successful long term.

SIDE NOTE: I am out of state on business the whole week and while being challenged regularly all ready I believe I am making good choices. It is tough because when pulled out of my routine I tend to reach for the familiar, and that typically has led to comfort food, TV, and obviously unhealthy practices. BUT even though my fellow travelers and esteemed colleagues have had to endure a larger than normal amount of stops on the way to our destination due to me keeping up with my shakes and fluid levels, we arrived in a reasonable amount of travel time considering the apparent "shrinking" of my bladder. Also tonight at dinner while I chose red meat for a second straight evening, I also chose peanuts(6) for my fat and starch, stuck to an abundance of water and veggies to accompany the all important entree and while I finished it, I kept the allotment within the allotted portion.

I will however concede that I am anxious about the banquets and their menus the next two nights as I do not want to veer from the program nor do I want to switch to all shakes because of it throwing my body out of its "burn rhythm" (my phraseology not fat camp's - I know Webster's should hire me to consult). So stay tuned as my week and routine could come under heavy fire by tomorrow night. I plan for now to continue as normally as I can with portions and shakes with the 100 ounces of water and take advantage of the treadmills and elipticals in the fitness center on property. If dinner doesn't present itself as totally healthy I plan to eat the parts I can and add a nutrition bar to the daily routine and increase veggie consumption during the day. Again stay tuned, this could be the first true setback I encounter.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

Discovering ways to "feel normal"

12/08/2011; 9:19a.m.:  My wife and I went out to dinner last night as we got caught running errands and found time to be in less of abundance than we had hoped by the time we were done.  We pulled into a steak house (national chain) and sat down with substantial appetites!

I perused the menu knowing there were limits to what I could have because I had my two shakes, 100 calorie sandwich thin with 2 tsp of peanut butter, a banana, and 75 ounces of water to that point already.  I came across a grilled pork chop with green beans, ordered a side of steamed mushrooms and a side salad with tomatoes, carrot strands, iceberg lettuce, onions and a hint of cheese to meet my quota for dairy topped with a mustard vinnagrette dressing. 

Before I go any further, i must relay a new personal discovery since I've started the journey with the good folks at the Aultman Weight Loss Center (AKA Fat Camp).  I am noticing for a man who loves to indulge with dressing on his salads, I need less than the standard one serving most restaurants offer when they deliver the salad.  I've been eating it on the side and not even coming close to finishing the portion brought to the table.  This is big (no pun intended) for me to realize I can enjoy the taste without over indulging in the caloric intake!!!

As my meal was served and eaten, I began to see a difference in my eating habits, both in methodology and size.  I realized because the program calls for 3+ cups of vegetables every day, when I order them at a restaurant, I have taken to ordering them cooked in water only, and salting to taste, as well as eating the vegetables first before indulging in the protein I covet both physically and emotionally!  Because I have adopted a new approach, I find myself full and satisfied more quickly than when I used to order an appetizer and starch with the meal!  It also helps me stay within the allotted 6.5 ounces of meat portion per day!

This has helped me enjoy the experience of eating out and NOT have to order a dinner salad each and every time we decide to do so! 

However, one thing I do not mention nearly enough is the support necessary to succeed on these types of life changes.  I am very lucky to have family and friends be both vocally and demonstratively supportive by creating positive environments for me to be part of without temptation for the most part in front of me.  But, it takes a monumental effort for my wife who already looks amazing to provide a home support system that creates an environment of success.  She too eats on a similar pattern, and has eliminated much of the white starch and carbs from her diet.  She has ridden the home of any type of substance that would tempt me away from the plan.  And she has allowed me the opportunity to vent when I crave but don't act, with an understanding of how truly difficult it can be to make such dramatic changes!  I will concede she too has set a goal of weight loss for herself since before our wedding in October, and has in no small way become my inspiration to be healthy.  But her strength and dedication to me and the cause at hand goes well beyond the call of duty to be a loving, supporting wife.  I am so lucky I get to share the experience with someone who truly grasps the trials and tribulations and because of such experiences like last night's meal out I have come to feel "normal" about the new approach to life and am getting much help in finding new ways to enjoy the times we so look forward to in a meal out and time spent together.

Two months to the day after marrying the love of my life, I'm finding a new lease on that life with a vastly extended warranty and options added on at no cost other than focus, persistence, love and support!  Thanks to all!  Thanks so much Jenna for making this such a positive experience in those most difficult times where choosing right isn't always fun!

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Every Negative Is A Positive

12/06/2011; 11:40a.m.:  Ok unfortunately I was right about the feelings I had going to weigh in at Fat Camp last night.  I did lose, ....an uninspiring 1.2 pounds, bringing my total weight loss to 22.4 pound in 28 days, and I now sit at 252.6 pounds.

Needless to say an expletive slipped out under neath my breath when I saw the numbers, but I still had to consult with my dietitian and attend fat class with the Behaviorist for the Aultman Weight Loss Program.  Thank God I did!   I learned so very much about not only the process, but myself!  But let me digress and set up the scenario causing me only to lose 1.2 pounds.

I should stipulate that 1.2lbs is a solid weight loss for anyone and my discontent only stemmed from my perception and a goal number I had in my head going into the evening.  But as I mentioned in my previous post, my body just hadn't felt right the last couple of days, and even though I did not veer from the prescribed program at all, I did cause myself the initial plateau.

As I mentioned in the beginning I currently work for the Canton Stark CVB as the Sports Promotions Manager.  Part of the tasks of my job is to plan and execute the Ohio High School Athletic Association State Football Championships Weekend.  We work with a local host committee and scores of volunteers (almost sounds like the needs of a marathon eh) to plan on a year round basis to execute the finals and the ancillary events wrapped around the weekend.  But the task of Championship Week execution is an animal unto itself!  It means long hours including really early mornings and extending into late nights for about 8 straight days.  Because of this I asked to go on all shakes and protein bars so I would have an exact amount of calories going in each day and wouldn't be tasked to count and measure each piece of the diet due to the extreme time crunch we face that week.  The thought was to grab and go but not to break stride with the progress being made.

HOWEVER, I made 1 HUGE miscalculation.  Part of the program from the beginning has been to keep the body hydrated at all times to properly process the greater amounts of protein being taken in and to keep the kidneys flushing on a healthy and regular basis to avoid unnecessary storage of excess waist.  Because I was literally on my feet and moving for about 15-16 hours each day I consciously avoided the amounts of water I typically drink so I didn't have to be taking restroom breaks too often.  This caused my body to shut down and go into survival mode, storing more than necessary.  My dietitian has increased the water intake from 64 mandatory ounces to 96 for two reasons: 1 - it'll help get my body back into the routine of burning calories that it had attained prior to last week and two, since the initial water weight is off, it allows the body to process the food and drink on a regular basis to allow me to continue to burn in a healthy way.

Now if not irritated before this "Not Such A Revelation" moment, I was completely cranky at the realization that I stopped "the burn" myself by not following one of the major premises of the program, constant hydration.  But the wonderfully patient and pleasant dietitian (despite my mood not being on par) reminded me of two things: 1 - a loss is a loss, and 2 - plateaus happen.  Needless to say I didn't really care to hear any of it at the moment, but I thanked her for her time and went into class to hear the behaviorist speak.

Here is where the night turned into a positive experience.  The Behaviorist picked the topic of staying motivated despite plateaus and remembering why I am losing weight.  Hmmmm....... divine intervention, maybe!  Luck of the draw, Absolutely!  This was what I needed to hear.  So aside from the obvious pep talk involved with this particular topic, came some real clear points!  I learned in ANY weight loss process people hit plateaus.  (This I did not know) And once the body rids itself of the water weight and initial weight loss happens, it becomes tougher to achieve higher numbers, but it is at this point the body makes its most dramatic and significant shifts.  (Ok- finally something I can grasp on to here!)  As the body burns consistently, a person could be on the exact same schedule and perform the exact same activities, and eat the exact same things and have dramatically different results from week to week.  (Wow - so this stuff is part of the routine, and somewhat beyond my control, ...Ok - go on.)  Furthermore we need not be so entirely focused on numbers that we forget the purpose of  the journey - HEALTH!  (Now I'm sold) 

I have said all along that I am doing this for long term health and that I want to feel good about myself knowing Ill be around for the long haul to care for and enjoy my life and family.  It was this reminder that convinced me whether it be 8.2, 4.8,or even 1.2 or less, every time I get on a scale and the number decreases it is less weight I have to worry about losing moving forward.  (And NOW we have the proper perspective, it just took an hour or so to sink through the 4-5 layers of concrete located north of my neck!)  This being said I believe all in all it was a successful week.  I learned important points for staying motivated and better understanding the journey i am on.  AND, I've gained some perspective on the ebb and flow of the weight loss process!

This was a great night because I realized, pant sizes don't change week by week most of the time but rather it is the bad habits I'm reforming day by day and week by week that will ensure long term sustainability once I reach my goal.  With that in mind I am typing this as I am finishing my 70th ounce of the mandatory 96 and the two shakes plus food routine is back with a vigor!  Funny isn't it, the week where the results of the numbers were the least impressive, the lessons learned and the knowledge gained have been the most valuable!  I like these folks at Fat Camp (Aultman Weight Loss Center), and the blob blog (fat2fit) has spun in a slightly different direction, not with standing the sarcasm of course!   ;-)

Ps- you can follow this link by clicking on the people tab of www.cantonmarathon.com where you will also see the less than inspiring "before" pics of me.  Hopefully as the results become more dramatic we will be able to post updates to those photos. (I've always said I have a face made for radio, but at least I hope to lose the body form to match...Geeesh!)

Monday, December 5, 2011

Pics Up

12/05/2011; 11:00a.m. Just a quick update for this morning. The pics of who I am and what I looked like on 11/08/2011 when I started the program are up along with this blog on www.cantonmarathon.com . Just click on the "people" tab at the top of the home page and scroll down. You will find my pics and link to this blog. Not that I am proud of that look, but I still think the honesty of having to look at these keep me moitivated day in and day out.

I will post to it after fat camp, and the weigh in. I have to admit, I think I might have hit my first bump in the road. A hectic work schedule didn't allow me to continually drink the water and although I held true to the diet and calorie intake levels, it is the whole program, and constant intake of water being part of it, did not happen as I have been accustomed to doing. So stay tuned and I'll discuss my results later this evening after weighing in and consulting with my dietician at the Aultman Weight Loss Center.